Trust and the Tuk Tuk Driver

Following a busy year and a fun time celebrating Christmas with family and friends Michael and I  headed off to explore  Cambodia. What a wonderful experience. One we can say is really life changing. We explored the recent and ancient history of the country. A true reflection for us is how people who have experienced so much trauma through war, poverty and so much change can continue to smile and importantly,  trust. Their faith and Buddhist beliefs seems to be the basis of strong values. We felt very safe and this was a result of how we genuinely cared for by restaurant, hotel staff and impressively: the local tuk tuk drivers. Last year there continued to be so much debate about trust and why is it eroding across society.  My  trust of others strengthens when they deliver against what they will say they do and when they do so from less self interest but really caring about my needs. It is why my family bonds are so strong. We have very strong commitment to being their for each other and being relied upon. However, back to our holiday! The Cambodian Tuk Tuk driver really taught us  about trust even in difficult conditions. Many have had to come to the cities leaving children and wives  behind for them to earn money to provide for their family. Often they are self educated and without extended family . Remember many have lived through being a chid trough the Pol Pot Regime. Whilst on holidays two beautiful connections made us realise we can learn from people in all walks of life. Andy The Friendly Tuk Tuk Driver (described by his Facebook page and on TripAdvisor!) came to collect us within an hour of email contact with his recently cleaned tuk tuk and took us from Phnom Penh to the Silk Island Koh Dac. On the way he thought of places we might like to see and spent time explaining the history or cultural context. He was in his late 20's. He was putting his brother through university and supporting a wife and new baby. He saw his purpose  was to work to educate his family. It was obvious he loved what he did . He drove safely and was very engaging. Even buying a coconut for us to drink after a full day exploring. Wherever we went he could be relied upon to be where he said he would be, and to think of our needs rather than his own. Our second example was a little more confronting for us. Mr Dee in Siem Reap ferried us around to the Angkor Archeology Park for 2 days. At one point we returned to our Tuk Tuk to see Mr Dee reading a book on Hitler. He told us he loved history and reading and felt it important to understand what makes evil people do what they do. He then explained to us that he wasn't really sure of his real name or age as he was child when he was forced with his mother and sisters to march from their family home to Battambang. Where they then had to work in rice fields. His father had been taken away.  On the way they contracted Malaria and his mother and sisters died. He recovered but had the experience of being orphaned and put to hard labour. He then escaped with a few other orphans to the border near Thailand where they were cared for in a UN camp. Many of his friends were sent overseas but he was raised by a local woman . He spoke fondly of her. He now has two adult children of his own and loves sharing Siem Reap with his customers. He made sure we appreciated what we were exploring, even having a book that helped us every time he took us to a temple. It was important to him that  we could understand what we were seeing. We were paying for transport but he took it onto his self to deliver for us a much richer service . He took it on himself to  really look out for our needs and Mr Dee  helped us get so much more from our holiday. He provided water,wet towels and a real personal connection. He has every reason not to trust others after his life experience but he is quite the opposite. Trusting and investing in relationships with others. In this way making our holiday so much richer. In two days we quickly realised we could trust him unconditionally. He was always where he said he would be and was always on time and in addition thought of our every need. Thank you Andy and Mr Dee for helping us fall in love with your country and how,  despite conditions and the length of time you spend with someone you can invest and form  trusting relationships.